Deborah P. Kolodji’s Vital Signs is possibly one of the most moving collections of haiku I have ever read. I love the way haiku moves, how it sees the world through slices, through moments between moments. I like the way that it acknowledges that life is both beautiful and temporary as it looks at seasonal markers that are temporary in a cycle of the earth that is also temporary but often seems permanent to us through our imperfect lenses. Kolodji’s haiku do all of these things, but add another layer, that of her own mortality and temporality as she deals with cancer. Kolodji just recently passed away from this cancer, but she was able to use the experience to give herself a different way to see and understand the universe. The poems in this collection mark time and the small moments that are both human and normal but odd in a way that one might not see unless they had the vision that comes with such an event.
Perhaps, in this collection, Kolodji’s appreciation and understanding of nature extends beyond the world to larger parts of the universe. It is as though her awareness of the here and now is filtered through a universal consciousness. My favorite is this one:
unresolved issues
the black hole in the center
of our galaxy (52).
She is making connections that extend far and wide, seeing connections that must be informed by a perspective that is seeing the universal. In another, she writes: “CT scan journey to Mars” (31). Later, she writes: “wheelchairs those Martian rovers” (39). Little moments come within the context of something larger than most of us see.
Where the collection truly shines, however, is in the discussion of the moments when she is dealing with her illness. She must be frustrated and afraid. That would only be normal. However, she is also compassionate and grateful. Haiku like:
fluid infusion
at the day hospital
the garden outside (27)
and
ice chips
by my bedside
another thick book (22)
deal with the long moments of dealing with the illness in the hospital. These are moments that she notes and understands, but without being maudlin. She even finds ways to appreciate where she is. There might be some regret here, but there is also the garden and the book. There are the good things. What she truly expresses gratitude for, however, are the people with her who help her and are just there for her.
embarrassing moment
the nurse acts as if
he’s seen it before (33)
alone
the nurse covers me
with a warmed blanket (20).
These small moments of kindness and compassion show the humanity that exists around her and show how much she appreciates the people who are there for her. There are many such moments in her collection, and the result for me was that I left feeling hope rather than dread, which I almost expected given the subject matter.
Deborah P. Kolodji’s Vital Signs is exceptional, and I cannot recommend it more. I never like sitting around talking about illness with others even when it’s mine. Doing so quickly becomes morbid and uninteresting. Kolodji’s focus, however, is not on pain but on hope. She shows us what dignity is and gives us a path for facing this kind of pain, which is in all of our futures.
John Brantingham 4th September 2024
